Examining Limiting Beliefs

While beliefs are an important part of life, often essential and necessary to life experience, they can sometimes act as a disservice.  It is a good practice to take the time now and then to examine our beliefs.  To see where we’re stuck.  To see where we can let beliefs go that no longer serve us.  To see which to keep.  Much like separating grain from chaff.  Merriam Webster defines belief as:

1.  a state or habit of mind in which trust or confidence is placed in some person or thing

2.  something believed; especially : a tenet or body of tenets held by a group

3.  conviction of the truth of some statement or the reality of some being or phenomenon especially when based on examination of evidence

Think of all the ways we have been told what to believe -whether by society, our parents, our teachers, our faith.  How often do we take the time to pause and reflect?  To examine whether these beliefs are something we hold to be true and right?  Perhaps this is why the Buddha advised:

Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.

Sometimes, upon examination, we find that we hold beliefs simply because someone told us it was so.  Maybe it was upon trying something new and being told we weren’t good enough right off the bat - when there wasn’t even time to practice - because, really, most of us aren’t going to play piano like Mozart the first time we touch a piano.  Or perhaps we have been told we weren’t smart enough, attractive enough, strong enough, we aren’t this enough or that enough.  How often to we internalize these things without ever questioning their truth and validity?  We merely accept them and believe we are limited in this way. 

Beliefs are often things we tell ourselves, baseless judgments made in a moment of fear or self-doubt.  Maybe we believe our heels will never reach the ground in downward facing dog pose, or that we’ll never be able to take handstand away from the wall. Or perhaps, we tell ourselves far more detrimental things, such as  we aren’t qualified to do the job we really want, or that we’re too old to learn something new.  The list goes on and on.  In her book Eastern Body, Western Mind, Anodea Judith talks about beliefs in limitations and says:

It is amazing how vehemently people will defend their belief in limitations.  “There’s no way I’ll ever get out of debt.” “No matter what I do, I always end up alone.” “No one can go to school while raising kids.  I’m stuck in this job forever.”  Even when you describe situations where people have broken these limitations, the person will find a reason why it will not work for them.  Belief becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

What it all boils down to is if we tell ourselves “I can never” we simply cannot ever.  Just because we tried it once before and it didn’t work, doesn’t mean it will not ever.  Just because it seems scary to surrender does not mean the liberation we feel when we do is not worth it.  When we fully let go, the beautiful possibilities are abundant.  Become the master of your own destiny.  Follow the words of Gandhi who said: “[m]en often become what they believe themselves to be. If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. But when I believe I can, then I acquire the ability to do it even if I didn't have it in the beginning.”

Many years ago, I was told to question everything.  To this day I find it to be some of the best advice I was ever given.  While it may be difficult or painful to examine ourselves and to question the countless stories we have told ourselves time and time again, the ability to grow from there is endless.  When we learn to see what is holding us back unnecessarily and we let go, the possibilities are astounding.